My story began a little while ago, but to save you half a day of reading I’ll keep it relatively short. I was officially diagnosed via laparoscopic surgery in June 2018 with endometriosis after years of fertility struggles and the emotional ups and downs that come with a chronic illness and no diagnose.
It was a semi unexpected find, considering I was going in for surgery to have a growth taken off my left ovary to improve our chances of having a family. The surgeons discovered endometriosis growing on various locations outside the uterus including on ligaments, near my bowel and bladder and other soft tissues. I’m sure there are more professional words for the areas they found the disease, but basically, they found what they had told me I most likely didn’t have.
Leading into the surgery I had suspected possible PCOS or endometriosis were at play in my body but did not realise to what extent or the challenges I would face. I had developed adult acne, constant fatigue, my menstrual cycle was changing ever so slightly, and I was having fertility issues.
As I hadn’t had children, yet the doctors decided to leave the growth on my ovary and focus on cutting out and burning away the disease they stumbled across in my body. The diagnosis that day after my surgery, explained a lot and provided many answers to the questions my GP couldn’t really answer.
Following surgery, I fell pregnant relatively quickly considering the already two-year journey my husband and I had been on, however sadly we miscarried 7 weeks later. This time was extremely tiring, hurtful, disheartening and frustrating; all things that make your heart heavy. BUT I knew it didn’t have to stay like that and I WOULDN’T let it stay like that.
I have an amazing husband who let me feel all the emotions and move through the experience all while supporting me in every way he could. I surrounded myself with positive, caring, uplifting friends who have been there every step of the way through this journey and opened myself up to them.
Actually, letting people in to feel your pain with you and support you is one of the most amazing things you can do when it comes to emotional healing! You don’t have to do it alone!
I cut all ties from things and people that didn’t uplift me or make me feel supported. The last thing I needed in my life at that time was negativity, complaining and “woe is me attitudes”. I basically surrounded myself with beautiful people and wonderful things that felt like sunshine.
Self-care and love are vital and I learnt to listen to my heart and to do what makes my heart sing! I started new sports and fitness regimes, found new friendships and deepened already existing ones, opened-up to family and friends, took time away from social media and also cleaned my social media up. I stopped following anything and anyone that didn’t make me feel happy and positive.
I’m so grateful for the journey I’ve been on and am still on as it has taught me endurance and strength. Endometriosis is a chronic disease affecting at least 1 in 9 women and rarely goes away. We are still on our fertility journey and as tough as it still is sometimes, we are just so grateful for what we have been through.
It’s a strange thing, but you really can’t appreciate the sunshine if you don’t experience the rain.
Alicia x
To learn more or find an endometriosis support group visit www.qendo.org.au